Phillips News & Summer Highlights

            This summer has felt remarkably similar to a time-lapse video.  For the blog, I’ve been missing in action through most of that time, so I decided to give you all some of the highlights and some of the lessons God has been teaching me (or re-enforcing) along the way. 

 

June

Maranatha Camps

For Jon, three of the four weeks in June were spent at Maranatha Bible Camp.  Each week he played a different role: cabin leader, emcee, and worship leader.  I visited camp occasionally during those weeks when I could.  While I missed having him at home (and I was admittedly a little jealous that I wasn’t able to be there too), I loved getting to see him invest in the lives of both campers and camp staff by using many of the ways God has gifted him.  During this time, we also both began walking alongside one of the camp staffers who had just graduated high school as she made some big decisions for this upcoming school year.         

 

Infertility: Re-Direct

In my last infertility update, I mentioned that we were looking into IUI.  As I researched, I still felt uneasy with that route, so I reached out to several friends who have gone through infertility.  One of those friends introduced me to NaProTechnology, Creighton Model Charting, and the Pope Paul VI Institute.  We decided to pursue that avenue of testing, and in June, my FertilityCare practitioner (who was teaching me the charting method) told me that she suspected I might have endometriosis, along with some other issues.  However, I had to complete two months of charting (which also involved several follow-up appointments with my teacher) before I could begin working with the doctors at the PPVI Institute in Omaha.       

New Nephew

In June, Jon’s brother and his wife welcomed their second child, Mark Erin Phillips III, into the world.  We now have five nephews and two nieces on that side!

July

Independence Day

By the 4^th of July, Maranatha still wasn’t sick of us, so they asked us to play some music for their big 4^th of July event.  It was another great opportunity for us to connect with some of Maranatha’s staff, and it was just plain fun!

            Infertility: Initial Consultation

I completed my two months of charting right as we were leaving for Grace Haven.  I had already gathered all of the necessary documents for a long-distance consultation with the PPVI Institute in Omaha (medical records, detailed cover letter, fee, etc.), so we put it all together, and dropped it off with my parents on the way to Utah so that they could get it sent off right after the weekend. 

Grace Haven Bible Camp

For the third consecutive year, Jon was asked to speak at Grace Haven Bible Camp in Utah.  This time, I was able to go with him (I am so thankful for a fairly flexible job and parents who were willing to take on our three dogs in addition to their own two for a whole week!).  There are some pretty awesome people whom we get to work with when we go out there (including some FSB alumni friends), and we have thoroughly enjoyed getting to see the familiar faces of several campers from year to year.  Grace Haven is a little out of my comfort zone as far as creepy-crawly things, rustic living, and extreme games, but I can’t help loving it anyway.  It’s good to be stretched. 

This year, I was so encouraged by the transformation we saw in one girl.  She came to Jon and I with a huge list of tough questions, and we spent a couple hours with her going over them.

(By the way, one of my absolute favorite things to do with my husband is to work together in counseling students.  We complement each other so well in being able to offer completely different perspectives, illustrations, and explanations.  These precious moments make me appreciate him so much!)     

We left that initial meeting a little discouraged because she was still unsure and confused about a few things.  As we prayed for her over the course of the week and as other camp leaders invested into her, eventually something clicked, and she put her faith in Christ not long before camp ended.  This was such a huge gesture of affection from God toward my own heart.  After having prayed for months and years about some things in my life with seemingly very little change, it overwhelmed my heart to see Him act so quickly and so drastically in this young girl’s life.          

Austin’s Wedding

The weekend after Grace Haven, one of our good friends from our life group in Scottsbluff got married.  Our life group transparently and vulnerably walked through some really tough seasons together, and they hold such a special place in our hearts.  I was reminded again of how important it is to be authentic and to intentionally pursue deep friendships.  We’ve talked before about how we never would have chosen each other.  If we hadn’t all gone to the same life group launch, we likely never would have become more than acquaintances.  God was so gracious to throw us all together in the midst of our mess, and I’m so glad we didn’t miss out because we weren’t willing to give each other a chance.   

  

Babysitting

The weekend after the wedding, I babysat our friends’ spunky, bright three-year-old in North Platte.  I also babysat her consistently from the age of 8 months to 13 months when we all lived in the panhandle.  This is another family we just absolutely adore.  While it was exhausting taking care of her largely by myself for the weekend (I have crazy respect for people who single parent), I love getting to be a part of her life.  She just brings so much joy.    

She’s currently in the “why” stage, and God used that to make me think about the ways that I ask Him the same question.  Sometimes it’s out of curiosity or a true desire to know the answer, but I know other times I use it as a way to try and make Him justify His actions or His commands to me.  He is God and I am not, and I don’t always have to know why in order to be obedient or to trust His character.             

August

            Infertility: Review Letter & Beginning Testing

On August 1, we received our consultation letter from the doctor in Omaha who reviewed our case.  She agreed with my charting teacher that my charts and history displayed several characteristics of a variety of issues, including endometriosis.  She recommended a whole slew of tests, starting with a thorough hormone evaluation.  I will get my blood drawn locally approximately thirteen times in the span of a month, and then it will all be shipped to the National Hormone Lab in Omaha so they can run the tests themselves.  Many of the other tests (including diagnostic surgery) will occur under anesthesia during a 7-10 day stay in Omaha.  Within 6-8 weeks, someone will call me to schedule the stay in Omaha.  The stay itself will likely be in 3-4 months, since that is the typical wait time for all of their doctors.  At the end of the testing, the doctor will meet with me to discuss the results and treatment options.  I started the blood draws this last Saturday.  One day, I was feeling particularly fearful about the blood draws and about the potential treatments I was reading about (progesterone shots sound like torture), and I opened my devotional book to see the title “Do Not Fear” and the verse 2 Timothy 1:7: “For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind.”  This was another sweet moment for me to realize that yes, God still sees me.    

Sterling

The first weekend in August involved a wedding, my sister-in-law’s baby shower (nephew #6 –  #1 one on my side – is due to arrive in just a few weeks!), Grandma Ruth’s 80^th birthday party, and worship service at the church I grew up in.  My mom asked me to come down for the weekend to help her with the many cakes and cupcakes she had gotten herself into.  The weekend was insanely busy, but I enjoyed getting to take part in all of the festivities, getting to spend time with my parents, and getting to briefly see so many people from my childhood.      

 

Class Reunion Weekend

This weekend was no less busy.  On Friday, I went to North Platte for a monthly life group made up of several Berean pastors’ wives (led by the wife of the president of the fellowship – Diane Mathis).  Spending time with other ministry wives has been so valuable!  Saturday’s main event was my 10^th year high school reunion.  Once we got past the slightly awkward beginning phase, Jon and I settled in and caught up with some people I’ve kept contact with and others I haven’t seen in years.  The trip to Sterling was a fast one because we had to drive back to be in Gothenburg for Family Day at The Crossing Fellowship.  Family Day involved worship led by the children’s ministry, a child dedication, a sermon about parenting, a potluck lunch, giant inflatable bounce houses, a slip ‘n slide, ga-ga ball, and a dunk tank to raise money for Backpacks for Kids.      

Visits from Utah Friends

One of the perks of living near I-80 is that we have friends coming through one direction or the other all the time!  One of our favorite ministry families from Utah was driving home this weekend after visiting relatives and stopped by for the Family Day service.  We didn’t get to see them while we were at Grace Haven this year, so we were super excited that they took the time to stop!  We also have another friend from Utah (and FSB alum) who might stop by this next week on his way home!        

Upcoming

Livin’ Out Loud

We are looking forward to Livin’ Out Loud next weekend: the annual free Christian concert that takes place essentially right in our backyard.  My parents are planning on coming to take part, and we will also have a booth for Catalyst Student Ministries this year.    

Catalyst Resumes

The weekend after Livin’ Out Loud, Catalyst Student Ministries will resume with lots of new changes!  You can check those out in the newsletter I shared earlier this week on my Facebook feed if you are curious, but we are stoked to get youth group kicked off again (we just had sporadic big events throughout the summer instead of meeting weekly) and to see what all God has in store for that ministry this year!  

If you made it all the way through this post, I am impressed!  I know so many of you reading this have invested in us in one way or another, and we are so thankful for you all!  For me, the over-arching theme of the summer has been community.  I mentioned so many different groups of people from so many different stages and areas of my life, and I just can’t imagine what life would be like without them.  People are so valuable, even to an introvert like myself.  I am so amazed at how God brings us into each other’s lives at just the right times and in just the right places.  I could go on and on about it, but since this post is already ridiculously long, I will simply say, thank you for being in my life (even if it is only in a small way).  Also, if you are one of those long distance friends and you need a stopping place on I-80, hit me up!  We’d love to see you!         

Winter Blast 2017

            You know you have just spent a weekend with a – what do you call a group of junior high students?  A herd?  A swarm?  A school? A gaggle?  A gaggle sounds appropriate.  You know you have just spent a weekend with a gaggle of junior highers when, between you and your husband,

You have shoes that smell like this:

You have clothes that smell like this:

You have muscles that won't let you get off of this:

You have a pair of jeans that looks like this (it's a sad day when your jeans decide to self-destruct in the final round of a game you instigated...p.s. the back has holes too):

You have a stance that looks like this (because you are still afraid that at any moment you might be shot in the neck with an invisible dart and have to fall on the ground paralyzed all while hoping someone will save you before the natives try to dump water on your face):

And you, upon returning home, have a bedtime that looks like this:

            We loved every minute of it, and are so thankful we had the privilege of getting our feet wet in youth ministry again at Maranatha Bible Camp’s Winter Blast.  On Friday, Jon and I loaded up our minivan (yep, no shame) with suitcases, music, speaking notes, a guitar, a keyboard, and a cajón, and we drove to the North Platte/Maxwell area to lead the chapel sessions at the retreat along with the help of a talented percussionist whom we met after we arrived.  Together, we led the worship time, and Jon gave the messages.  We also were able to participate in everything from playing games like Gaga Ball and Nine-Square to discussing the history of One Direction (the band) with sixth grade girls at sixth-grade-girl decibels and levels of sass. 

Some of My Maranatha Camp Mementos

The whole weekend was a ton of fun, but the best part was getting to see pre-teens learn about Jesus, sing about Jesus, and pray to Jesus.  Junior high years are so difficult and so crucial.  I remember being incredibly stressed out, confused, and frustrated all the time in junior high, but I also remember that those were the years when I really started to understand what walking in a relationship with Jesus in my daily life meant.  Those were also the years when I got to see one of my dearest friends put her faith in Christ (on a side note, Maranatha played a major role both in developing my walk with Christ and in the salvation of my friend - it's a great place of ministry!).  They truly are formative years, and they are years when students desperately need to know that they are loved and accepted.  Pointing them to the One who loves them and accepts them perfectly and completely is such an honor. 

Throughout the weekend, my husband taught through Ephesians 2:1-10.  Over three sessions, He explained how we were dead in our sin, we were made alive in Christ when we believed, and how we can live in a way that fulfills our purpose by living for the One who gave us life.  Of course, he also sprinkled in a variety of colorful and memorable illustrations and some occasional banter with random students who liked to interject.  During the fourth session, Jon went over a quick review and then instructed everyone to split up into groups to talk about what Jesus meant to them and how they could use the gifts that God had given them to bring Him glory.  In addition to the main messages and the small group times, the students were able to hear interview-style testimonies from several of their leaders about what life was like for them in junior high and moments in their lives when God really drew them to Himself.  The students were also given opportunities to share what they had been learning with the whole group.  Through it all, I was encouraged by the testimonies of other leaders and of the students, and I was challenged by my husband’s messages once again to live every moment and use every gift for the One who created me.  All in all, as paradoxical as it sounds, this weekend was an exhausting time of refreshment, and I cannot believe just how much I've missed working with youth!  

A Life Unexpected (Part 1)

“Where You go, I’ll go.  Where You stay, I’ll stay.”

-“I Will Follow” by Chris Tomlin, Jason Ingram, & Reuben Morgan

The caterpillar sat on a small branch with the front third of his fuzzy body stretched up to the sky. 

“I was born to fly!” he exclaimed, “I just know it!”

He was tired of spending his entire days eating and crawling, and he was certain that he was made for something more.  But try as he may, he could not lift his little non-aerodynamic body off of the branch.

Okay, so I may have read The Very Hungry Caterpillar entirely too many times in the past couple of weeks to the little boy I babysit, but this scenario provides a pretty good picture of how my husband and I have felt this past year.  Before I dive into an explanation, I need to give you a little bit of background.  Last December, God very suddenly pulled us out of full-time ministry.  We absolutely know that it needed to happen, but the necessity of the removal doesn’t change the fact that we were ripped away from a life that we absolutely loved.  For a year and a half, we were passionate about the work we were doing, and we felt like we were fulfilling God’s purpose and call for our lives by using the talents and abilities He had given us to serve Him.  Out of the blue, it all came crashing down around us, and we found ourselves carried away in a whirlwind back to the area where we attended Bible college.  Since then, our heart has always been (and still is) to return to full-time ministry eventually.  However, God has not yet given us the privilege of doing that.

In the meantime, we have been focusing on healing, growing, and learning in the midst of the daily grind of a life we didn’t choose or want.  In the beginning, I desperately needed the break from full-time ministry, so even though I was grieving heavily, it was fairly easy for me to welcome this next chapter of our story.  However, as the months have passed and I have experienced more and more healing, I have found myself battling the discontent that wants to slowly creep into my heart.  I ache with the memories of spending each day taking care of my husband and the house and working alongside him to reach into the lives of those around us in various ways.  I especially miss the Sunday nights of laughing, playing, and discussing Biblical truth with the youth and watching my husband teach them.  Without a doubt, ministry had its own set of challenges, but there’s no other way we would rather spend our lives.  Yet, that desire seems so out of reach at times.  God has been gracious to allow us to help with leading worship at our new church, and He has given us a few short windows to help with youth events every once in a while.  While we are truly grateful for the opportunities we’ve been given, we still wish that we could devote more time to ministry.  My husband and I have both struggled off and on and to different degrees with feeling like that caterpillar this year: frustrated and stuck to the tree branch when we really want to fly. 

As I was wrestling with all of this again recently, God directed my thoughts to the life of His Son.  For each struggle that entered my mind, He reminded me of a relatable situation in Jesus’s life, thereby showing that He understands exactly what I am going through:

1)  In some ways, our current situation feels like a huge step backward from where we were.  We know that’s not true, but it’s hard to get our hearts on board with what we know.  Jesus is fully God, but He humbled Himself and came to earth as a human in the absolute lowest and most helpless of ways.  What a seemingly backwards transformation!  Logic says that this must have been a derailing of the fulfillment of His true calling and purpose.  Yet, He was right where God wanted Him to be and where we needed Him to be.  This humbling transformation was not a deviation from the course or a backslide.  It was the very fulfillment of His purpose for that time.

2) We work hard because God tells us to be faithful, but sometimes it feels like we are wasting precious time investing ourselves into our secular jobs.  This is not to say that our work is at all meaningless or unimportant, but it isn’t what we  really want to do, what we believe we were really designed to do, or what we believe we are called to do in the long run.  Jesus worked as a carpenter until He was thirty. 

3) I struggle with worrying about what other people think about our situation, though I know that God is the only One I should worry about pleasing.  People thought all sorts of things about Jesus.  Some thought He was from Satan.  Others thought he was a crazy person, a liar, a pretender, and a blasphemer.  Still others thought He was just a good man or a good teacher.  The truth is all that really matters, and God sees the truth.

4) We have been tempted to rush ahead of God into ministry without really seeking His will.  Jesus was also presented with the opportunity to rush ahead of the plan when Satan tempted Him in the wilderness with all the kingdoms of the world and their glory. 

Jesus understands what we are going through, which brings me comfort.  He shows me that I am equating ministry too much with serving God.  Ministry is certainly one expression of service, but service to God is ultimately obeying Him.  Obedience may look very different from what we expect.  The caterpillar is indeed made to fly in due time, but it is also made to eat and crawl in order to develop.  God is not only concerned about what we do, but who we are.  He sees our complete transformation and all of the works that He prepared in advance for us to do throughout that transformation.  Sometimes our job is to go.  Sometimes our job is to stay.  Either way, our bigger job is to trust Him, to obey Him, and to be faithful to what He has called us to do today.